This isn’t news: How I spend my time, and why do I say stupid things.

Beware the Ideas of March. Or don’t, free country and all that.

It’s March, which means warm weather is coming soon, something always to look forward to.

Speaking of things to look forward to; since I started my letter-writing campaign, I really do look forward to checking the mail and finding letters from folks I’ve reached out to.

Not to hit the ominous-warning opening on the head too much (still trying to find my voice for this blog, so bear with me folks), but I have an unlucky 13 people who have so far agreed to exchange addresses for my letter-writing project – which means I might want to reach out to others soon.  

After two months of my project, I’ve found I enjoy writing hand-written letters a lot more than I thought I would. What started out as a chore has turned into something I look forward to doing at the end of the day.

So first lesson, just try things. It’s a cliché, but a cliché for a reason. But even more so, make a conscious effort to make things happen. Actively seek out joy, a good lesson for all…..within reason.  

As I’ve come to enjoy taking the time to write – and read—what people took their time to write me, I’ve started to really think about the words I choose to use when sending letters, knowing I can’t those words back once I put them in the envelope and stick on the stamp.

The world might be a better place if people were reduced to only being allowed to communicate so many words in a limited amount of time with people – we’d probably say better thing than the usual nonsense we tend to go on and on about.

I’ve been reflecting a lot about time and how I use my time and what that in turn say about me. It really is quite startling when you do the math and make a small spreadsheet on how you spend your time –and it does not paint a flattering picture....yes I did make a chart…friggin YouTube, man…..

So, something to work on.

Second lesson, reviewing what you say (and don’t say) to people, and then ask why. Those two task bring some troubling answers from time to time, I must confess. But trouble usually brings personal development --- sometimes -- that is a generous way of putting it, but I’ll stick with it.

Another observation, I tend to be less reserved when writing letters. When I have time to think, I think I say things with more substance or the things I want to say – but don’t say in public. Either out of being timid or second-guessing myself. Granted, when I’m writing I also second-guessing myself – the joys of the editing process.

Sometime being timid is really me trying to be polite, because I’ve been known to have too many foot in mouth moments.

Anyway, back to positivity.

Perhaps the biggest takeaway I have so far from my letter writing-process is I have an amazing group of friends with a wide variety of interest. Which is really cool, because I hate talking about the same thing over and over again. I do admit, sometimes there are conversations I have conversations with people in my life where I know what they are going to say, because they say the same things all the time.

It’s not that they aren’t making a good point or they mean anything by it, but I tend to lose my temper or get frustrated when people ramble.  

I make a point in my letters to keep it to a page and a half, anything more than that and I feel like I’m rattling.

However, realize for some people, they need more words to say what they want to say.

When I write letters, I don’t take the time to add insults or make fun of people, because I know my words or limited. …so why not do that in person? Cheap insults seem to be a waste of time, so it’s something this month I’m hoping to address.

I remember covering a youth conference a year ago, and the speaker was talking about the Four Gospels: “Matthew, Mark, Luke and John,” and how in terms of page length, they aren’t that long.

What I found so mind-boggling was how four books bout the most important person to have ever lived really are reduced to a day’s reading.

It means the Gospel writers had to pick the most important details, the most telling stories, the 

information that the young Christian communities absolutely NEEDED to know, and the rest had to get cut.

It’s the most extreme example of using your words, and using them carefully.

Now, I’m not an Evangelist (Capital “E” evangelist) all Christians are called to evangelize. But I think there is a valuable lesson there.

Think about the words you use, and why you use them.

Think about the people you spend time with, and why you want to be with them.

And think about what you do, and why you’re doing it.

Good lessons for March.

Good lessons for the year.

Beware the Ides of March, and watch out for the Soothsayers and malicious senators.

Courage.

Step One: Do step one

Good Evening internet,

It’s Groundhog Day. Bill Murray, you’re a national treasure.

Aside from today being a holiday centered around a rodent, I’m told he saw his shadow….but I am not 100 percent sure what that means, and no, I’m not going to look it up.

But I also promised myself I would write a monthly blog about my New Year’s Resolution/effort to live more “Holy moments,” inspired by Matthew Kelly’s “The Biggest Lie in the History of Christianity,” to write letters to people in an effort to be more intentional about communication.

So here we are – one month in. Granted,  it took me a week and a half to go to Meijer to buy paper, envelopes and stamps to write said letters, but letters are letters, so here we go.

To date, I have eight addresses of people who have agreed/been coerced into my letter-writing journey, with topics varying from New Year’s Resolution to what I think of modern-day NFL offences spoiler alert, I kind of hate them, and everything in between.

With the super-frigid weather that has hampered the United States Post Office which operates through rain, shine and government shutdown, I haven’t gotten letters back yet – but to be fair I’ve been rather slow with mailing them out.

I also still have a list of people I haven’t written my first letter too, and people who have expressed potential interest in my project, but I haven’t gotten down to getting their address yet.

OK, enough of the appetizers, time for the meal.

The process for all of this begins with a simple request. I need a person’s name, willingness to exchange letters, address and an opening topic. From there I am hoping the conversations carry on naturally from there. In Communications courses at Aquinas College this was called a dyad (spelling might be off – warning, this entire blog is not responsible for proper spelling/grammar/manners).

The subject matter of the letter vary well enough, which is good because I hate, HATE, talking about the same thing over and over again. Yeah, probably a weird thing to admit for someone who writes for the Church, but luckily our faith has so much going on, from schools, to parish ministry, immigration and general human interest pieces, it really is a new topic every day.

I like talking about different things. And I’m lucky enough to know people from a diverse array of backgrounds, where I can dabble in different topics with different people.

Anyway, back to letter-writing….and this blog. Adamantly, the blog was going to be the most challenging part of this whole experience, for many reasons.

Number one, I write for a living. So sometimes in my downtime, I don’t feel like writing. But really that is really a copout since I always keep a notebook of story ideas and short columns  next to my bedside table, so I am really always writing, just most of it will never see the light of day – because most of my ideas are either half-baked or I don’t know where to start with the research and framing of the story. I have this habit where I kill more than half my story ideas before I even dare speak them out loud.  Side note: if you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m using italics for my asides instead of parentheses. The AP style guide police can come find me whenever they want.

But the biggest reason why the blog would be a challenge is I have had blogs in the past, but updating them on the regular has been a challenge. Like, a really big challenge.

The closest I got to a regular blog posting was a bunch of posts I did 2013-14 during the summer when I was on temporary assignment with the Ann Arbor News. The blog, “Barstool Banter” clever right….? was my musings and amateur review of dive bars in Ann Arbor… and later Jackson and Grand Rapids side note: some guys like clubs, other guys like trendy bars, I’m forever a defender of the classic dive bar, you just feel more at home. The blog was from the perspective of an introverted reporter who didn’t say much but made note of everything. Really, it was a blast. I'm sure this blog lives somewhere on the internet....but I prefer to think it doesn't.   

The blog was regularly posted because I was mostly bored and had time. My job with the Ann Arbor News would be to go get photos and follow up to police and fire calls…not the most chipper material to cover, or write about high school sports. Usually, I would get off from work around 8 p.m. in Ann Arbor, and then midnight or 1 a.m. when I moved back to Grand Rapids.

This is a work schedule which encourages a lot of drinking during the closing hours because I never mastered the ability to go straight from work to bed. Godspeed if you can.

So, being awake at midnight and 1 a.m., and nobody in my social circle willing to stay up till 2 a.m. on  random Thursday night. Going to bars to wind down after work was just a habit not a healthy one, I might add. And then it turned into a writing experiment. Telling a story of what a passive observer sees. Making it all seem relatable.

It was fun to write for a few reasons.

One, part of the joke was the blog was meant to be terrible, so I didn’t give too much about writing style side note: with this scrap I’m typing away now, probably not going to use too much spell-checker; just warning you now.

But second, it was nice to write with a “voice.” Not really reporting, just observing. And writing in a style I enjoy reading, and not really giving two bits if other people liked it. Side note: Enjoying something because you don’t care what others think…..novel idea.

OK. Back to the letter-writing.

I was this whole project to focus on stop floating around and just waiting for things to happen and really make an effort to build connections with people. In a world that is so super-connected, we seem to be divided on everything. Yes, I know I’m not the first shmuck to say this, but sorry, it’s true. This issue isn’t really connectivity, it is honest to goodness connections aren’t coupled with our connectivity.

We’re certain of what people think, but hesitant to ask why.

I’m tired of interacting with people via Facebook comments and retweets, so I thought this could be a change of pace.

Now, before you accuse me of “Old man, yells at the sky” riot act, I will like to say I love technology and social media. It has a lot of positive values in today’s world ----and some really awful values that have brought wholesale destruction to how we as human beings deal with one another.

So this is my one-man, Don Quixote-like charging at the windmill effort to try and live out more meaningful relationships. I’m hoping the practice of purposely taking the time out of my day to write letters, to really focus on my words and what I choose to say. And this will somehow lead to some personal, spiritual growth on how I treat people overall.  

I am a big fan of the YouTuber CP Grey, who made a post about how you spend your time communicates a lot about yourself. And I after doing some review, I realized I don’t do enough in intentionally reaching out to people. So I hope this letter campaign (I probably need to think of a better way to say that….it doesn’t make for good marketability) will help.

Also, more importantly, not just how often I communicate with people, but the way I select what to say and how to say it.

A nifty things about letters, there are no comment sections, no delete buttons and no editing. Aside from a few scratches, it really is just first thoughts coming to mind and putting them on paper. 

There is something both authentic and vulnerable about that, Note to self,  authentic and vulnerable……remember the connotation between those two words when thinking of Detroit Catholic ideas.

But even more than the intentionality or having a greater understanding of choosing what words, phrases or even things I say more meaningful.

So here’s to the project. Here’s to starting something new…and make a concentrated effort in keeping with the plan.

One a first readthrough, I worry this blog post might be a little lame. But it is an introductory piece……I might write another bit tow weeks from now as the first “real” post, since really this is just a pilot episode. But I wouldn’t hold your breathe.

I am looking forward to writing more letters, receiving letters from folks, and God-willing, learning something about people and myself, and how to just be a better person. Which I like to think is everyone’s goal.  

And here is to all of us, living out more “Holy Moments.”

--Courage.

SIDE NOTE: If you want to be part of said letter-writing campaign, let me know via ways you normally interact with me.

SIDE NOTE TWO: I’m not in love with the name of this blog….who knows it probably will change every post. So feel free to send suggestions.